a friend of mine wrote...

"Images have flashed past me at blinding speeds .. There is nothing I can do. There is nothing anyone can do.

This is the way it is. This is the way it has to be.

It feels like my heart has been speared from my body as my face crashes down onto the hard pavement. It's numbing. I can hear voices around me .. People walking by. Noone has noticed my corpse .. My heart has shattered on a stake only to break into a 'squillion' bits across the footpath. A dark man trips over me only to get back to his feet and continue on his journey.

On the way down .. I noticed a beautiful sunset. It was only a few moments ago that I saw how great the world is .. and how great the world can be. But here I lie .. Un-noticed. Un-wanted. Lonely.

The butterflies that once swamped through my stomach have been stolen by those around me. I can only lie there and watch them take it away. I'm unable to fight for what I believe is right. I'm unable to voice what I feel from my heart. I'm unable to move my arms. I want to take those butterflies back as they were given to me. They were mine . . . They are no more.

Life can be cruel sometimes. No matter how good of a person you are. Even when YOU know yourself that you're a good person. Someone who thinks of others before themselves. Someone who would not hesitate to give a stranger a smile even when it's the last smile they have to give ..

Everything that has been planned .. and dreamt about .. and all the promises that you've kept .. everything you said that you'd do .. and wanted to do .. taken away in an instant.

And in the end it's just you .. Without a heart .. Without feelings .. Without the desire to be who you were .. Without the desire to care for others as you previously did .. Without the motivation to share a smile .. A laugh .. You're empty inside ..

Empty .. "

He wrote that - and in a million years I wouldn't have been able to write that, in a million years I wouldn't have been able to articulate how it feels to be broken the way he has. This isn't the way I feel now, but I've been there as I'm sure many of you also have. I just never thought that feeling could be explained in writing.